what are the things that makes your choose your partner of life?

الكاتب : albentalyemenia   المشاهدات : 1,008   الردود : 12    ‏2007-05-30
      مشاركة رقم : 1    ‏2007-05-30
  1. albentalyemenia

    albentalyemenia عضو

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    alsalam 3alkom
    how are you all.....
    when it come to marriage, what are the things that makes you choose your wife or husband?
    ?






    Abu Hurairah (RA) related that the Prophet Muhammad (Sallahh
    Alaihe Wassallam) said: “Men choose women for four reasons:

    1. for their money,
    2. for their rank,
    3. for their beauty
    4. and for their religion,

    but marry one who is religious and you will succeed (Bukhari, Muslim).

    He said that most of his time is spent in correcting marital problems and discords, he also said that most of the calls he gets on TV are about problems with marriage!

    WHY?

    He said that he sees marriages of practising Muslims (beards, Niqab, Hijab) fall apart and its on the rise.

    WHY?

    He said that the first misconception is that the Hadeeth ONLY applies to men choosing women; but Scholars have stated that it is equally sound for women seeking men!

    In his opinion he said that the problem is in these areas:

    • Men and Women don’t consider RELIGION to be the top priority and it’s the same; time and time again! Physical attraction overrules religious priorities

    • Men and Women don’t consider the secondary priorities. He said considering religion doesn’t mean that you ignore other bits! He said that the potential spouses must be attractive to each other and the secondary priorities differ for men and women…He said choosing a spouse has affects on YOUR GENERATIONS so be VERY VERY careful! He said for men perhaps the secondary priorities could be “Beauty” or “Rank” but for women it MUST be “Money” (as stated by Scholars and I forgot who he quoted!) because men must be able to financially bear the cost of the household and he said that some sisters overlook that!

    • He said we also have to look at Kuff (compatibility and matching) of spouses…He said even marrying women who have grown up here look for “Kuff”….Personally I was surprised about this because not many Salafi Shaykhs say this & in my practical experience; Kuff is ignored at your peril!

    • Then he said that “Bid’aas” and customs in our marriages have an affect. How can you start your life with Bid’aa, following culture and intermingling of ...es & expect the help of Allah (SWT) in your marriage?
     
  2.   مشاركة رقم : 2    ‏2007-05-30
  3. albentalyemenia

    albentalyemenia عضو

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    why is hard tooooooo.......

    WHY.........


    *Why is it so hard to tell the truth but
    yet so easy to tell a lie?
    *Why are we so sleepy in mosque but
    right when the prayer is over, we suddenly wake up?
    *Why is it so hard to talk about Allah but
    yet so easy to talk about nasty stuff?
    *Why is it so boring to look at a Islamic Article but
    yet so easy to look at a nasty one?
    *Why is it so easy to delete a Godly e-mail but
    yet we forward all of the nasty ones?
    *Why are the mosque's getting smaller, but
    yet the dance clubs are getting larger?



    Do you give up?






    Think about it ....






    Are you going to forward this, or delete it







    Just remember-Allah is watching you.






    Prayer Wheel, Let's see the devil stop this one! Here's what the






    wheel is all about. When you receive this, say a prayer for the






    person that sent






    it to you....






    There are no costs, but wonderful rewards.... Let's






    continue






    praying for one another.






    As we look at this article we realise how true the






    Messenger(P.B.U.H) was these signs were prophesized






    1400 years






    ago!!!






    Take a look.... Now this is scary but soooooooo TRUE!!!!






    * Camels will no longer be used as a means of transport;






    * People will ride on saddles that aren't saddles (cars?)






    * The distance on earth will become short;






    * Horses will not be used in wars;






    * Muslims will defeat the Byzantines which will end with the conquest of Constantinople(Istanbul)






    * The Jews will gather again to live in Bilad Canaan;






    * Very tall buildings will be built;






    * The disappearance of knowledge and the appearance of ignorance, with much killing;






    * Adultery will become widespread, and the drinking of wine will become common;






    * The number of men will decrease and the number of women will increase until there are 50 women to be looked after by one man.






    * Islam will become worn out like clothes are, until no one will know what fasting, prayer, charity and rituals are;






    * Allah will send a disease to fornicators that will have no cure (Aids?);






    * People will begin to believe in the stars and reject AL QADAR (THE DIVINE DECREE OF DESTINY);






    * Men will pass by people's graves and say: "Would that I were in his place"; (large amount of sucidal deaths?)






    * The Euphrates will uncover a mountain of gold for which people will fight over (the river of Alfurat that lies near Syria);






    * Two large groups of people will fight one another, and there will be many casualties; they will both be following the same religion (World War II?);






    * Approximately 30 DAJJALS will appear, each one claiming to be the messenger of ALLAH;






    * Earthquakes will increase;






    * Time will pass quickly;






    * Afflictions will appear;






    * Killing will increase;






    * Wealth will increase;






    * Women will be wearing clothes but not wearing clothes






    * THE PROPHET (saw) SAID: "IF MY UMMAH BEARS 15! TRAITS(QUALITIES), TRIBULATION WILL FOLLOW IT." (DAY OF JUDGEMENT) SOMEONE ASKED,"WHAT ARE THEY O MESSENGER OF ALLAH?" HE (saw) SAID:






    * When any gain is shared out only among the rich, with no benefit to the poor;






    * When a trust becomes a means of making profit;






    * When paying ZAKKAT becomes a burden;






    * When voices are raised in the mosque;






    * When the leader of a people is the worst of them;






    *When people treat a man with respect because what he may do;






    * When much wine is drunk; red wind or the earth swallow them, or to be transformed into animals."






    * 'IMRAN IBN HUSAYN SAID: "THE PROPHET (AS) SAID, 'SOME PEOPLE OF






    THIS UMMAH WILL BE SWALLOWED BY THE EARTH, TRANSFORMED INTO






    ANIMALS, AND SOME WILL BE BOMBARDED WITH STONES'. ONE OF THE






    MUSLIMS ASKED, WHEN WILL THAT BE O MESSENGER Of ALLAH?' HE SAID,






    'WHEN SINGERS AND MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS WILL BECOME POPULAR, AND MUCH WINE IS DRUNK.'"






    *THE GREATER SIGNS OF THE HOUR The Quran will disappear in one night, even from the people's hearts, and no Ayyah will be left on earth. (Some groups of old people will be left who will say: "We heard of fathers' saying "LAILLAHA ILLA ALLAH" so we repeat it)






    * The appearance of the MAHDI;






    * The appearance of the DAJJAL (Anti Christ);






    * The appearance of Ya'juj and Ma'juj (biblical Gog and Magog);






    * Isa (Jesus) will come during the time of Dajjal;






    * The rising of the sun from the west;






    * The destruction of the Ka'ba and the recovery of its treasures;






    * The smoke.






    DO YOU GUYS ASK EACHOTHER QUESTIONS LIKE THIS. SOME IT ARE ACTUALLY HAPPENING IN REALITY.
     
  4.   مشاركة رقم : 3    ‏2007-05-30
  5. عــاهد

    عــاهد مشرف سابق

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    Ok im ma make this simple.

    The ways i'd choose a future wife is based of the following reasons:
    her religion
    ( she has to be a wife that loves and respects her religion more than me, so this way she know what a muslim wife is like towards satisfying her partner in life)

    Her reputation
    (In order for me to live with a woman happily ever after, i have to be the first one in her life that she loved and forever will love. Which mean i don't want to go to work and come back while someone else is sharing my bed)

    Her Character
    (she should be a woman who would always be on my side during good times and bad times, she has to be a wifey that respects me as her husband and not treat me like a hommie​
    )


    Ohhh and one more thing
    she has to look niceeeeeee
     
  6.   مشاركة رقم : 4    ‏2007-05-31
  7. maram

    maram عضو فعّال

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    [grade="800080 FF1493 FF0000 32CD32 0000FF"]
    interesting topic

    first i think that
    In Islam, the husband is the leader of the family, and the wife is his support and consultant

    so it is very important to choose the right leader for your family

    and when it comes to marriage the first thing that makes me choose a husband is the Deen a person that knows his Deen will know how to respect and treat me well

    He has to be respectful and kind

    He has to know how to take care of others

    He has to be wise and knows how to handle situations wisely

    He has to love but not hate

    He has to Trust me as I will do

    He has to love me as I will do

    He has to be except me for who i am

    He has to be a good role model for his kids

    He has to be educational and learn from his experiences

    Will there is a lot in mind but i don’t want to give ya a headache we can't find all these in one person because no one is perfect but ALLAH
    kul wahd ma yakhuth ela nassebah[/grade]
     
  8.   مشاركة رقم : 5    ‏2007-05-31
  9. عــاهد

    عــاهد مشرف سابق

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    Daym Maram Those are allot of condition you are requesting there.
    It would be hard for someone to qualify for this position.

    Ahhhh man i guess i am not lucky enough. LOL

    salam


    Salam
     
  10.   مشاركة رقم : 6    ‏2007-05-31
  11. albentalyemenia

    albentalyemenia عضو

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    alsalm 3alkom
    mashallah alll seem to be wise bas allah wa3elm........
    and yeah maram dont be to choosey lool
    bas inshallah inshallah every1 will get what they want inshallah...
    allah maeyath3 alsabren
     
  12.   مشاركة رقم : 7    ‏2007-05-31
  13. wisdom _ye

    wisdom _ye عضو

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    it is important to argue a interesting topic like this one. some of you discussing from religous side which every single muslim likes to have a religous wife or husband as i prefer too.anthoer point that i would rather than any thing else is the family background for partener. indeed, we have to look into the family envernment so that we can know more about future partener. aslo we have to look into nighborhood so that we will learn more about him or her. as for me i will choose that one who has a clean family background . as for relgious and love it comes for me as the second thing as i know such things will build by times. alot of people appear as a relgoius ones unfortunatly we deal with them we find out some different thing that makes us escape of them. be careful do nt look for very long beard as a signal for religion . the envernment of future partener is very important to make me pick her up among thousands of beatiful ones. bye
     
  14.   مشاركة رقم : 8    ‏2007-05-31
  15. maram

    maram عضو فعّال

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    ya lucky i cut it right there
    but there are still a lot of stuff
     
  16.   مشاركة رقم : 9    ‏2007-05-31
  17. maram

    maram عضو فعّال

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    insha allah ta3ala
    im not too choosey u asked 4 my opinion lol
    :D
     
  18.   مشاركة رقم : 10    ‏2007-06-01
  19. shareef

    shareef قلم فضي

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    There was an unlucky guy once upon a time, who was very picky in choosing a wife. he had to many characteristics in his dream girl. for example: smart, but not too smart, beautiful as if she was an angle, not too tall, not too short, wide and blue eyes, very pure and softy skin and the list go on and on. His best friend urged him to give up some these characteristics, because there isn't such a girl with all these features. But he insisted that he will keep looking until he find "her" so he spent about half of his life looking, but didn't find any. Until one day he saw his best friend again: his friend asked him if he still looking for a woman with all those features: he said no I have giving up all the proposed features except for one, which is "to be a woman"....lol i'm not aginst having proposals when chossing wife/husband, by the way, but if you have alot of them you might end it up like that guy....
     

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