hi guys>>>who is expert in writing???

الكاتب : اٌل-البيت   المشاهدات : 371   الردود : 5    ‏2006-03-15
      مشاركة رقم : 1    ‏2006-03-15
  1. اٌل-البيت

    اٌل-البيت عضو نشيط

    التسجيل :
    ‏2005-11-17
    المشاركات:
    307
    الإعجاب :
    0
    good after noon every one,
    who is an expert in writing; knows how to write effectivley ,?


    best regards
     
  2.   مشاركة رقم : 2    ‏2006-03-15
  3. جراهام بل

    جراهام بل مشرف سابق

    التسجيل :
    ‏2003-04-05
    المشاركات:
    12,156
    الإعجاب :
    0
    we can help you?
    go ahead bro
     
  4.   مشاركة رقم : 3    ‏2006-03-16
  5. حبوب

    حبوب عضو متميّز

    التسجيل :
    ‏2005-12-09
    المشاركات:
    1,614
    الإعجاب :
    0
    will be more than happy to help you with what you need..........just ask and Inshalah you will get what you asking for................GOOD LUCK..........;)............ana :) 7abob
     
  6.   مشاركة رقم : 4    ‏2006-03-16
  7. اٌل-البيت

    اٌل-البيت عضو نشيط

    التسجيل :
    ‏2005-11-17
    المشاركات:
    307
    الإعجاب :
    0
    thanks guys ,,, how kind all you are

    here is what am seeking help for

    i have this short paragraph about A Good Marriage , and I wonder if some of you could go through the paragraph and fix the errors i have
    the blue sentences down there are ,my instructor's comments
    its gonaa help i guess

    thanks again



    A good marriage is not just a marriage that is based on establishing a family and bringing children only, but also a marriage that is based on a strong foundation of respect too (REPETITION/ GOOD TOPIC SENTENCE). When a certain marriage is based on a strong foundation of respect, it means that each partner of that marriage is rational enough; eventually, his/her marriage will be an effective seed in his/her society (UNCLEAR. WHAT’S THE CONNECTION BETWEEN YOUR TOPIC SENTENCE AND THIS IDEA OF BEING ‘RATIONAL ENOUGH’? MAKE SURE THAT YOU SUPPORT YOUR CLAIMS WITH CLEAR EXPLANATIONS AND EXAMPLES, WHICH ARE RELATED TO YOUR TOPIC SENTENCE. USE ‘HIS OR HER’ RATHER THAN ‘HIS/HER’). So, for each partner to respect the other, he/she must realize that he/she has some rights that must be done to the other without shorten in order to make his/her marriage stronger, durable, and remain peacefully forever. Also, having a good communication and giving the other the chance to speak when its necessary needed is considered as respect too (DEVELOP). Moreover, respecting each other’s opinion and criticing accepting them (FRAGMENT, NOT A SENTENCE). However, for some people it may be kind of difficult to respect their life partner which obviously means that they cannot respect their self either. And that’s a main reason for divorce when it comes about. In short, a marriage that is based on establishing a family and bringing children only may remain forever, but it wont be as good as if it was based on a strong foundation of respect too.

    This contains a few good ideas and glimmers of ideas, but it is only the beginning. You need to do a lot more serious thinking about your topic. Make sure that you develop your examples properly. Make sure that each of your examples is CLEARLY RELATED TO THE DEFINITION IN YOUR TOPIC SENTENCE. MAKE SURE THAT EACH OF YOUR EXAMPLES EXPANDS THE DEFINITON IN YOUR TOPIC SENTENCE. Make sure you use proper transitions. Fix your problems with word choices, word forms, articles, verb forms, word forms, articles and sentence fragments. I’ve shown some of the places where these problems occur but not all..
     
  8.   مشاركة رقم : 5    ‏2006-03-17
  9. SamiAlganhey

    SamiAlganhey عضو متميّز

    التسجيل :
    ‏2004-11-29
    المشاركات:
    1,590
    الإعجاب :
    0
    Hey, I tried my best to help. I dont know if that's what your looking for or not. But that's what I Got.1

    First Some Changes,1

    A good marriage is not just a marriage that is based on establishing a family and bringing children only, but also a marriage that is based on a strong foundation of respect too (REPETITION/ GOOD TOPIC SENTENCE). When a certain marriage is based on a strong foundation of respect, it means that each partner of that marriage is rational enough; eventually, his/her marriage will be an effective seed in his/her society (UNCLEAR. WHAT’S THE CONNECTION BETWEEN YOUR TOPIC SENTENCE AND THIS IDEA OF BEING ‘RATIONAL ENOUGH’? MAKE SURE THAT YOU SUPPORT YOUR CLAIMS WITH CLEAR EXPLANATIONS AND EXAMPLES, WHICH ARE RELATED TO YOUR TOPIC SENTENCE. USE ‘HIS OR HER’ RATHER THAN ‘HIS/HER’). So, for each partner to respect the other, he/she must realize that he/she has some rights that must be done to the other without shorten in order to make his/her marriage stronger, durable, and remain peacefully forever. Also, having a good communication and giving the other the chance to speak when its necessary needed is considered as respect too (DEVELOP). Moreover, respecting each other’s opinion and critiquing accepting them (FRAGMENT, NOT A SENTENCE). However, for some people it may be kind of difficult to respect their life partner, which obviously means that they cannot respect themselves either. And that’s a main reason for divorce when it comes about. In short, a marriage that is based on establishing a family and bringing children only may remain forever, but it wont be as good as if it was based on a strong foundation of respect too.

    This contains a few good ideas and glimmers of ideas, but it is only the beginning. You need to do a lot more serious thinking about your topic. Make sure that you develop your examples properly. Make sure that each of your examples are CLEARLY RELATED TO THE DEFINITION IN YOUR TOPIC SENTENCE. MAKE SURE THAT EACH OF YOUR EXAMPLES EXPAND THE DEFINITION IN YOUR TOPIC SENTENCE. Make sure you use proper transitions. Fix your problems with word choices, word forms, articles, verb forms, word forms, articles and sentence fragments. I've shown some of the places where these problems occur but not all..

    2nd

    A Few Words Might Help???

    About Children

    Parental divorce reduces the likelihood that children will graduate from college, and achieve high-status jobs.
    Children who live with their own two married parents enjoy better physical health, on average, than children in other family forms. The health advantages of married homes remain even after taking into account socioeconomic status.
    Parental divorce approximately doubles the odds that adult children will end up divorced.
    About Men

    Married men earn between 10 and 40 percent more than single men with similar education and job histories.
    Married people, especially married men, have longer life expectancies than otherwise similar singles.
    Marriage increases the likelihood fathers will have good relationships with children. Sixty-five percent of young adults whose parents divorced had poor relationships with their fathers (compared to 29% from non-divorced families).
    About Women

    Divorce and unmarried childbearing significantly increases poverty rates of both mothers and children. Between one-fifth and one-third of divorcing women end up in poverty as a result of divorce.
    Married mothers have lower rates of depression than single or cohabiting mothers.
    Married women appear to have a lower risk of domestic violence than cohabiting or dating women. Even after controlling for race, age, and education, people who live together are still three times more likely to report violent arguments than married people.
     
  10.   مشاركة رقم : 6    ‏2006-03-17
  11. SamiAlganhey

    SamiAlganhey عضو متميّز

    التسجيل :
    ‏2004-11-29
    المشاركات:
    1,590
    الإعجاب :
    0
    I hope that Helps A little, I'm Not Sure. If You need more information just let me know????

    Regards
    AKA
    SamiAlganhey
     

مشاركة هذه الصفحة